Monday, February 28, 2011

If It's Not One Thing, It's My Mother: Yeesh


Free as a snowbird, I have travelled all the way to Sunny Southern State to enjoy a relaxing vacation. With my parents.. On a golf course... Okay, so it's not exactly South Beach, but Shady Pines has it's pluses.
I had only been here a day when I noticed that my parents, Ward and June Cleaver-Blogshaw, had given each other Valentines Day cards. So sweet. Or so I thought. I innocently took the time to read the cards, which were displayed on the kitchen counter (no, I wasn't rummaging through their dresser drawers... that was the next day).
I looked at the pink and red card first. It was from Ward to June. The sentiment read: "They say Valentines Day is all about the love. Which is good, because somebody ate all the candy. Oh well, have a great day." Awwwwww, cute.
The pink card with sparkly purple designs was from June to Ward. The sentiment read: "Oh, you've set my heart to racing. Feel it? That's not my heart." The inside caption said: "Happy Valentines from someone you can always misbehave with."
The picture was of an old man with a pop-up arm that jerked himself off whenever you open and close the card. Ewwwwww. I didn't realize it was going to be this hot at Shady Pines! Yech.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not...


... He loves me, he loves me not. He loves me.

I am a romantic. The dictionary describes me as: being preoccupied with love or by the idealizing of love or one's beloved. Yep, that's me. The dictionary also describes me as: fanciful, impractical and unrealistic. Fair enough.

When I was a girl, which seems not so long ago, I never dreamed of my wedding. I never dreamed of the dress, the venue, the flowers or the ring. I used to dream of the relationship. I longed to meet and marry the man of my dreams. To find and hold onto true love. Seemed simple at the tme. Turned out to be the longest, hardest search of my life.

Finally, 2 years ago, I found my true love. A man different from any I had known before him and it changed everything. The love that grew, and continues to grow, makes me feel beautiful, desirable, important and supported all the time. Truly loved. Has it been as easy as I had thought a relationship between two lovers would be? No. Has it been a story book romance or a love story that looks like it does in the movies? No. Has it been the most rewarding experience of my life and worth the work? Absolutely.

This post is dedicated to my lover, G Spot. I nicknamed him G Spot for the purpose of this blog because, unlike other women perhaps, my G Spot is in my heart. And that's right where he got me. From the start. Being faced with the unlikely prospect of our relationship not working out (see previous post about related problems called 'Relationsh*ts'), was unfathomable. I would not operate at the same level if he were not around. Perhaps he wouldn't, either.

To all the fanciful, impractical and unrealistic sexy singletons out there, keep at it. As Bridget Jones, Carrie Bradshaw, Cleopatra, Scarlett O'Hara, Jerry Maguire, Adam & Eve and Elizabeth Taylor (?!) would say, Happy Valentines Day!