Monday, May 21, 2012

Big Daddy = Big Cokehead?!

Well, well, well...  Maybe that explains his behaviour!  Imagine my shock and horror when a mutual friend of mine and Big Daddy's, told me that he suspects cocaine use (due to recent frazzled encounters).  Who knew?!  Certainly not me!
Now, I'm no angel, however I am no junkie!  Never having tried cocaine, I had to refer to the internet to check the signs of use:
* Impaired Thinking - This might explain why he took off so abruptly after declaring me the "love of his life"
* Confusion - Clearly he was very confused!
* Depression - Saw a touch of that - seemed inapropriate to the situation at hand.  Especially considering it was Valentines Day.  Pull it together!
* Sleeplessness - The man kept me up all night long wanting to cuddle or watch tv.  I thought he might be a vampire...
* Loss Of Appetite - I wish he suffered from that - he was starting to get a bit fat!
* Decresed Sexual Appetite - Definitely not a symptom that he suffered
* Restlessness - He was like a kid in a candy store when we were together, however I thought his intense interest and desire to do 20 things at once with me was flattering...
* Very Talkative - Yes, he could talk the talk but didn't end up walking the walk.  How typical!
Well, we may never know for sure, however it seems that it's a distinct possibility that I was delusionally dating a doped-up druggie! 

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Guest Post: Meet Singles Wherever You Are

Yes!
I am pleased to post tips on how to meet a match as declared by the dating gurus at Singles Warehouse, a UK internet dating site. Read on for their tried and true tips:

Being single means a lot of things … one thing for certain is that it means every man and woman you meet is a potential partner. You don’t believe it? Well you should. As a single person, you need to be able to meet singles wherever you are. It could be at the grocery store, at the gym, at the park, at the bookstore and at your favourite restaurant … there are prospects everywhere. You just need to know how and where to look.

Here are some tips and tricks to scope out the singles in your area:

 Always look around for people you’re attracted to (make sure they don’t have a wedding ring on!)

 If you see someone you’re attracted to, give them a nice smile and turn away, then look at them again and smile … just in case they weren’t sure the first time

 When sitting or standing always keep your body language open, don’t cross your arms and look welcoming

 Frequent places, areas and activities you are interested in so that you find others that have the same interests and discuss your interests with them

 The coffee shop is a great place to meet singles, just don’t hide behind your computer or book, make sure to look approachable and smile if someone looks your way

 If out at the bar or pub, over drinking may give you that extra confidence you need, but it will also ensure you make all the wrong choice, so one or two drinks should be your maximum if you’re there to meet someone

 Last, but not least, you need to always look your best wherever you go, even if you don’t feel like it. Why? Because you never know who you’re going to come across and meet while you are out.

So as you can see, you can meet singles wherever you are, you just need to know how and where to look!

Happy Dating!

Singles Warehouse

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Don't Get Your (Granny) Panties In A Knot!



... I wonder if my sex tape will get a similar reaction when it gets released...




... I wonder if, in the future, my spinster friends and I will have similar, knowledgeable and reminiscent banter while watching the sex tape du jour when the time comes (comes - heh!)...



... I wonder why, given the overwhelming reactions of the grannies, Kim K didn't stick with this guy!