Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Yes, Ma'am


My vacation at Shady Pines is almost over. I have enjoyed almost every minute of it (except for ones mentioned in blogs below) and will miss spending days poolside, soaking up the sun and checking out the eligible silver foxes. I will not, however, miss being referred to as "ma'am."

What is up with that??? It is a dreadful term used mostly by Americans (they are SO sh*t upon, but for this they REALLY deserve it) and most commonly in southern states. It is SO insulting - why not just call me "old lady" or, as I'm more commonly known "old, old, tragic spinster". It's a term that I associate with older Southern women (see picture above - I do not look like that). What kills me is not so much when young kids say it, but when men MY AGE refer to me as "ma'am" - who do THEY think THEY are??? Not sure what the term is for men, but would they like me to call them "Oldtimer", "Granddaddy" or "Colonel"?

I'm not sure how many of these offending Americans that this blog will reach, but I emplore all offenders to immediately stop using the term ma'am among any women who do not display any of the below visual signs of aging:
* crows feet
* saddle bags
* laugh lines
* age spots
* sagging skin (except for that on the upper arm - there seems to be no effective way to combat this specific location after the age of 30)
* wrinkled skin ON THE BODY
* blue/purple rinsed white hair
* white hair full stop

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