Sunday, January 25, 2009


How many dates does it take to find a suitable partner? According to Emotional Fuckwit '08 (see related post below), it takes over 300. I should have raised my eyebrows (I'm sure I did but the shock was blinding and obviously limited my sense of reason at the time) when he told me that he'd dated over 300 women in the few years since his divorce. 300 women???!!! That seems like a lot of ladies, nights out, drinks, money and STD's...

After this admission, I SHOULD have wondered about how picky he is. I SHOULD have known at that point that he was obviously seeking the delusion of perfection. I have heard it theorized that we (the category of 'we' excludes the following: cads, casanovas, gigolos, pimps, hookers, whores, contestants on The Bachelor, etc.) could make it work (meaning: have a relationship) with every 5th person that we date. If this is true, Emotional Fuckwit '08 had 60 chances with women whom he could have had a meaningful, longterm relationship with. Instead, he CHOSE to go on 240 more dates than he really had to. Why didn't I think of it this way before? I could have saved myself such emotional anguish and confusion over his intense Daniel Cleaver-ish behaviour.

I'm not sure how many people I've dated at this point. I gave up counting a while back, due to many issues including memory loss (a sign of aging), the fact that I can't count that high and that there are a few special cases that I've blocked out of my mind. As many people as I have been out with, I can assure you that it's nowhere near 300 - that's just obscene. When it comes to 300, I can think of better things to do with that number:

* 300 European, South American or Caribbean vacations

* 300 pairs of sexy shoes

* 300 dirty martinis to help aid the memory loss

* 300 calories burned each time I THINK of going to the gym

* 300 men lusting at the chance to date ME

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