Isn't it fabulous when your little brother gets married...

... before you do? Four months before you were supposed to get married?? And one month after your fiance has taken off??? Yep, that's right! A few weeks ago, I rsvp'd to my brother's wedding. The wedding that I had anticipated attending with G No was last night. Although I had found a suitable replacement date, it was too late to add a seat at the table, so I managed through it alone. I did, however, end up having 2 dates with me - my super supportive aunt and uncle. At the party, I soon found myself with a suitor, danced the night away and turned down a marriage proposal. All in a night's work! I wore a beautiful dress and got lots of attention. People couldn't stop commenting on it and saying what a mistake G No made. And how crazy he must be. Clearly.
My worry leading up to the big day was how I would handle the ceremony (I knew that the reception would be okay - I love a good party!). Just like watching the royal wedding last week, as soon as the bride started walking down the aisle, I burst into tears. It was hard. However, it was temporary and I was able to get through the rest of the ceremony without having a nervous breakdown. When in doubt, just show up looking fabulous. It distracts people and is a great ego boost!
First a royal wedding, then a royally difficult wedding. Is this making me stronger? Absolutely. At the very least, I can take comfort in the fact that I've got two down and none to go!

Vera Wanker

This weekend, I found myself at one of the most upscale bridal shops in Cosmopolitan City. I should preface this by mentioning that I haven’t been to many weddings at all (let alone trying to plan one). I’m pretty much a nuptual novice. Perhaps I should have brought an entourage to help me find a dress, however I felt that I would have an easer time on my own. Having an easy time at Upscale Bridal Shop was not meant to be.

Quite typically, I encountered the worst of the stereotype of the hoity-toity salesperson. It was so Pretty Woman. Ummmm, ladies, please remember… You work there. I shop there. ‘Nuff said. Trust me - if I didn’t have the gold Visa limit of my mother, the spare-no-expense-for-the-love-of-god-you’re-finally-getting-married June Cleaver-Blogshaw, I wouldn’t have bothered walking through the door. Jeez!

Apparently, according to the Vera Wankers, it’s simply scandalous to ask if the famed designer would create such an ungodly concoction as a cocktail or tea length dress. The horror! You would have thought that I’d asked where the collection of polyester dresses was… I also had the nerve to ask if any of the Wankers were available to help me, as most were just sitting around looking average. After much dissatisfied clucking and rolling of the eyes, I was told that they only work by appointment. Of course. Since when did wankers become important enough to work by appointment only??? In my experience, you certainly don’t need a good time to have a Vera Wanker!