What Guys Really Think: Hot Hairstyles

Who would know better about the hairstyles that men are hot for than the well-researched journalists at Cosmopolitan Magazine? Cosmo has combed the streets (!) to poll eligible bachelors about which hairdo's do it for them. Here are the top cuts:

* The Bad Girl Bump: Now, this is not to be confused with the bizarre bump that sits (too) proudly atop Snooki's head. Apparently, a small pouf adds a touch of glamour. Also, wearing your hair up shows off the neck and shoulders, which is obviously the real reason why men like it.
* The Sexy Shag: Don't think Austin Powers. Do think Meg Ryan. When you think Meg Ryan, however, please think back to her sexy, Sally Hersberger cut, not her current botox/trout-pout look. Thanks.
* Pretty Pixie: I don't believe this. I know that men prefer long hair - I read it somewhere. However, if you must sport short, men seem to like a short cut with bangs a la Ginnifer Goodwin. I think they probably chose her due to her current role on a polygamist drama, but whatever...
* Relaxed Updo: Why? Because it's elegant, simple and touchable. Why, really? Because it looks like you got dressed up nice and then spontaneously had a wild, sweaty, sexy romp, that's why.

What Guys Really Think: Your Hair and Makeup

Welcome to my new topic: What Guys Really Think. Based on the title, you are correct to assume that these will be short posts!

This week, thanks to the lifestyle gurus at Yahoo.com, we will examine what men really think about our hair and makeup. Not surprisingly, it turns out that women use both sides of the brain to perceive beauty. Men? Well, they only use the right side of the brain. Yep, they're only using half their brain, but we already knew that... This is how they interpret half-brained beauty:

* What He Notices First ~ 81% of men said that they notice eyes first. 19% are lip men. The 81% who said eyes really meant to say boobs.
* Eye Makeup ~ Apparently, men prefer darkly lined eyes and smoky eyeshadow. This makeup style makes the eyes look bigger, which is a turn on. I can't pull off a smoky eye. I am sad.
* Eyelashes ~ Not surprisingly, men are not hot for fake lashes. Perhaps it's the glue marks. Perhaps it's the constant eyelid fluttering and rubbing. Perhaps it's the strip that comes unglued and hangs off... Whatever it is exactly, try to avoid it, my little Tammy Fayes.
* The Right Amount of Makeup ~ Not too much. Not too little. I must say, I've found the opposite to be true in my clubbing and general evening out experiences in Cosmopolitan City...
* Pink Cheeks ~ Break out the blusher. Flushed cheeks signaled that a cave babe was healthy back in the day. Our lovable neanderthals, only using half their brain power, are still intoxicated by it.
* Lip Colour ~ Not too dark. Not too bright. Not too slick. Not too matte. Tell that to the patrons of most of the bars, clubs and circuses in Cosmopolitan City!